


No, Sam!

by Luluthechoosingcrow



Category: Greta Van Fleet (Band)
Genre: Attempt at Humor, Bad Dirty Talk, Cockblocking, Crack, Humor, M/M, Smut, Wordcount: 500-1.000
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-03
Updated: 2019-11-03
Packaged: 2021-01-22 07:09:42
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 699
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21297611
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Luluthechoosingcrow/pseuds/Luluthechoosingcrow
Summary: Short and shitty, I needed something to make me laugh this morning. Sam and Danny keep getting interrupted.
Relationships: Sam Kiszka/Danny Wagner
Comments: 2
Kudos: 8





	No, Sam!

**Author's Note:**

> Author (As known on Various sites): Lady Lover- Rockfic, Luluthechoosingcrow - AO3, theladylovingcrow - Deviantart and Wattpad, @sammy_bluebells - Instagram, @imacrowcawcaw - main Tumblr, @theladylovingcrow - writing/art Tumblr, @insannywestan - Sanny shipping Tumblr  
Fandom: Greta Van Fleet
> 
> Author's Notes: This took like 20 minutes, I just wanted to do something funny with a little bit of dialogue I had. Enjoy!
> 
> \-----------

"Come on, Danny. Please, please give me some, I'm dying for it!"

"No, Sam."

"Just a few little thrusts! Come on, what do I have to do to get you to fuck me?"

"SAM. Not now, okay? I think we should stop."

"But whyyyy?" Sam whined, doing his best puppy dog pout.

"Because I think I hear your parents in the hallway!" Danny whisper-yelled, eyes a little wide with panic. 

"Oh, crap."

At that moment, raucous laughter rang out through the house, coming from right outside Sam's bedroom door. 

The two on the bed shared a nervous look, wondering if they were found out. 

"Oh! Kelly, did you hear that? 'I'm dying for it!'" Sam's mother yelled, voice mimicking Sam's, though it was strained with laughter. 

"I think we should leave them alone, dear. They're probably very busy." That was his dad. Sam's face turned tomato red. 

"Well, I don't think much is going on at the moment. Didn't you hear?" Karen repeated.

"Are you being safe, boys? STDs are still a thing, even if you're gay. Do you need some condoms?" Kelly asked, clearly standing on the other side of the wooden door.

"No, uhh... were good. Thanks, Dad," Sam bit out awkwardly, clearly not wanting to respond but also wanting everything to end. 

There was some more snickering, and then a couple minutes of quiet where Sam and Danny still did not dare to move.

"Do you think they're gone?"

"Maybe. Oh damn, I kinda lost it." 

"Yeah, I can tell. Want me to blow you? Gonna get you nice and hard, so big, want you to fuck me so bad. I'm so horny, Danny," Sam whispered the last part in his ear, clenching around Danny to punctuate his point.

Danny helplessly groaned and pulled out, moving up to straddle Sam's chest when-

"Aha! I fucking knew Sammy was the bottom bitch!"

Jake's voice, coming from... the window? Crap, the open window. 

"Shit, we never closed the window last night. It was too smoky in here."

Sam gave Danny a 'now YOU shut up, idiot' look and called out to Jake.

"Hey, what the FUCK?! Can you leave us alone, please?"

"Aw, but baby brother finally got with his man! How could we leave now?"

Josh was there too, apparently.

Sam threw his head back and groaned in exasperation. "Ohh my godddd."

The twins snickered from outside, most likely thinking he was getting some good dick. The knowledge that they were probably standing on tree stumps just to reach the window didn't even bring Sam much comfort.

Danny was still awkwardly sitting on his chest.

"Uhh... should I go make them go away? Are we even gonna continue?"

"No. I'm not really in the mood any more."

"Damn, okay. Wanna watch a movie?"

"Yeah, sure. Why don't you go get The Dark Knight?"

While they had been talking, Danny had stealthily crept (more like crawled naked across the floor, which meant Sam had to stifle his laughter) over to the window. 

He peered out, checking the surroundings. "Yep! They're gone. Fuckers are probably happy they ruined our fun," he muttered. 

"Aww, baby, the didn't ruin nothin'! Get over here, sexy!"

Danny snorted and walked back to Sam, first making sure the window was closed and the door was locked. 

"Your dirty talk is great, but only when you're actually getting fucked."

Sam looked offended. "Excuse you! My dirty talk is great all the time. I'm not even gonna blow you now." 

"Well, if you don't blow me then it's gonna be hard to get fucked. Isn't that what you've been begging me for?" 

Sam considered it. "Okay, yeah I'll blow you. God, I hope we don't get interrupted again."

Danny sighed and threaded his fingers through Sam's hair, letting him work. 

"You'd think that finding alone time would be easier at home, not worse than on tour."

Sam hummed an affirmative, mouth a little too busy to respond with words.

*Bang bang bang*

"Samuel Francis Kiszka! If you do not return my jacket right this minute I am busting down this door!" Ronnie yelled.

"Oh for the love of God!"

"So... we're not having sex?"

"NO, SAM!"


End file.
